Marvellous Monday

For all those curious...tonight is T for Trigger thats right Im getting those eggs ripe and ready for picking Wednesday morning....I think this is one of the high moments of IVF knowing you have some follicles ready with hopefully some good mature eggies..All in all this IVF cycle #1 definately has had highs and lows but Im proud of myself for overcoming fear of needles...Im proud of my DH supporting me even though there were some stressful moments eg mixing our pregnyl shot together then on our last injection last night for pregnyl we did not have the 1/2ml measuring syringee which our clinic forgot to give to us so we were ringing around our local pharmacy which is like 25 km away and luckily was opened until midnight so we got it..DH got so stressed out god bless him
So pray for me please for Wednesday that I get some good eggs ripe and ready for fertilisation

Fantastic Friday

Well as it goes...15th day for my FSH injections...yes my body is addicted to these drugs since I was sloowww responding in the beginning I require a few more days of these drugs...so yahhh even with low ovarian reserve I now have 8 measurable follicles over 10mm, 2 at 16mm, 1 at 23mm and rest between 11-14mm. My Fertility Specialist wants to see how I go over weekend and measure again Monday for EPU Wednesday so I have more eggs..so looking pretty good apart from my dam irritating cough I have..may have to venture off to take my antiobiotics as no extra herbal medicine allowed on IVF :(
Every day I appreciate medical world for such invention and am so amazed about the whole IVF process...its still amazing how much control they have over my cycle and all I have to ensure is that I inject, sit back and relax and think positively grow follicles grow..Thank the universe for medical science and my wonderful and handsomely gorgeous fertility specialist is enough to put a smile on my face

Mighty Monday

Its also great to start the week off on a high...yes I had my third blood test and my body is now responding to FSH yahhh I had a good reading in bloods over 800 which is great (nurses words as I dont understand what is a bad reading)...so now fingers crossed for Wednesday for my bloods again and ultrasound for some fantastically mighty looking fresh follies.....

and a lovely announcement yesterday from long time IVF TTC Chon from http://mypathtoinsanityandbeyond.blogspot.com/ who finally got her BFP which is great news and thats what gives us all hope that our turn will come too

Focusing on the positives....

The therapeutic treatment I needed after yesterday and thought I would share to help the rest of you:-

1.Crocheting

Here is a picture of the blanket I gave my sister in law with baby boy due next week....cant wait to make one for my own

2. Walking my beautiful dog on a beautiful sunny autumn moring


3. I can see the colours of the autumn leaves


4. My husband is still standing by me even with our difficulties of becoming parents

5. We own our own house still paying off but has allowed me to work from home part time with my accounting business after selling most of my business I operated for 5 years

6. My husband I have travelled to many places around the world ...We are yet to go to Europe together hopefully one day we get there together ...IVF financially has stopped this but we still have been to Thailand, Japan, Fiji x 3, Hawaii and many other places within Australia

7. I have strong family bond to support me all the time

8. The journey of TTC has opened my eyes up to the spiritual world

9. I am educated has allowed my husband I to now afford IVF and the clnic and doctor ouf our choice.

To cry or not to cry....

Now I know this journey of TTC is difficult and heart wrenching...and I know the words of IVF and the journey is even harder....I have been dealing with it one day at a time thats right I think its the only way to stay above....
2 Blood tests down and one Ultra Sound...how many more to go? Who knows? God knows? Well I hope he bloody does and is kind to me.....

It was like a production line this  morning at the Ultra Sound all the ladies lined up getting their scans to see how many follicles they have and anything else ...I always battle nerves going through the process what do I expect today...I emptied my bladder as soon as I got there ie 45 min drive to my clinic and lots of fluid in morning always busting to go ...then had to wait approx 15 minutes...thought better empty bladder again as its filling it and it sure did need emptying...

US found 1 follicle right ovary and 5 follicles on left with a 3.4 cm cyst endometrioma....what the F**** ?? I was just on zolodex for 3 months to suppress my hormones just went through a second laprasacopy to get rid of them all and this bloody cyst had to appear (it was 1.3cm prior to starting FSH but too small to remove in laparascopy)....please body be kind to me...please

Anways after driving home and settling in after visiting my heavily pregnant Sister in law due next week after all my tests...I had to drive all the way bak 45 min there and back to get my extra goodies...yummy more drugs...now I get to inject myself every 3 days with pregnyl to stimulate ovaries a little bit more to give me good and better quality eggs

The positive my FS did not ring me to discuss the findings from the nurses and instructed second lots of drugs...got to be apositive as he is wishing to continue with me...so there is still hope !!!

In between waiting for the results and my scans this morning ..I visited my sister in law had a big cry before I got there and then tried to forget about my journey whilst there and focus on her baby to be and another lovely visit of 3 week old baby....babies all around ...god is that a sign that Im one step closer or gods way of teasing me? I thought visiting her was good therapy for me to surround myself with  more babies or am I insane?

So next is another BT on monday to measure then probably a BT and US Wednesday.....Now I really feel like a drug addict as pregnyl I get to mix two components together ...oooh Im so excited

Haidees baby shower gifts

To a deserving woman who has suffered a long and hard journey in TTC..something all us IF can related to and from BC website....Blessings to you and your baby boy to be!!

These are traditional pastizzis being maltese cuisine always at occasions like baby showers, parties and even my wedding as late after dinner snack.....I would love to share them with you in person but a picture is just as good....Yes Im not maltese but my husband is and all my sisters married maltese so I have had plenty of years having this treat...

And here is a poem to celebrate this day for you via cyberspace

Special Day

You’re going to have a baby!
That’s so wonderful and sweet!
It will be so very magical
When you two finally meet.

I’m very glad you’ve asked me
To come celebrate with you
And join you at your  shower
To have fun the whole day through.

It will be a very special day
For all to come and see
How beautiful you look
As a mother-soon-to-be!

by Andra Mccoy

IVF Cycle #1 has started

Now after waiting for over 3 months since my first consultation with my FS and being on Zoladex...My FSH injections have started....my journey is one step closer now to getting my miracle...2 injections down 10 to go then bam trigger shot...well all is hoping anyways..first blood test tomorrow will see how my ovaries are behaving and responding..
I have an overwhelming feeling of excitement that we have a plan out of our control but its a plan...I pepped myself up for first injection by listening to circle and bloom cd...meditation is my favourite...burned my flavoursome melts to give an all over positive energy in the house and it worked...the injection went in smoothly without a hitch and lucky for dear hubby DH by my side....I am excited...and no bruising yet lets hope it stays that way ..

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Also have to thank which I am a little late in thanking..Red Power Ranger for her award last month...such awards are new to me and as becoming familiar with the blogging world...I have put it up and Thank you Tee for your award
http://infertilitee.blogspot.com/ to link back to her blog

I will get back to awarding others as since Im only new I love all my bloggers that I watch.

Ten things about me:-
1. Since starting my IF journey I learnt to crochet and am now in process of making gifts for people in forms of blankets...
2. I am scared of heights however I managed to do some thrill seeking experiences last year to try to overcome this...parasailing in Hawaii and zip lining
3. I am claustrophobic but managed to go on some water slides last month in Gold Coast, Queensland
4. I am an animal lover and was dieing to volunteer at animal shelter but cannot at moment as cannot risk catching anything when I am TTC
5. I love chocolate and lollies but since January 2011 have cut a lot of sugar out and managed to lose 8 kgs so in perfect healthy weight range to start IVF as per my FS so dark chocolate is now my new best friend as better for you
6. Married for nearly 8 years
7. Ran my own business for 5 years now downsized to work from home all part of the destressing and to allow room for IVF
8.  Love spending time with my family, brothers, sisters, parents and nephews/nieces..we are a very close family and I miss not seeing them all the time
9. I love going for morning walks/bike rides pending my fancy...may  need to stop bike riding when I get my BFP but walking will still endure
10. I am spiritual enlightened and this TTC journey has opened up my eyes to this

Signs from the universe...

Well it is over a week since last posted due to my wonderful holiday in Fiji so to my cyber friends and supporters yes it was well worth it...

Who would have thought my overseas trip to Fiji would be one of inspirational and spiritual encounters not just relaxing...for those who understand or relate to spiritual world...or those wanting to please read

I went with no expectation of nothing and to basically focus on hubby and my time together to rejuvenate our marriage before we go into our first IVF cycle..and for those who dont know. remember we had to change our date of travel that was already booked due to IVF cycle starting this month

Signs of hope and universe is on my side this time...

1.Met a couple on our holidays with 5 year old who out of conversation non fertility related blurted out her child was IVF baby and I just blurted out I know what that is like...so we got onto conversation on IVF and infertility...
2. Met another couple who live like 20 minutes away from us, who also were not meant to come on this holiday... but found out they are enlightened by spiritual experiences from his daughter who passed away and had one of my guardian angels come to him to give me a message via him and the female whose daughter is a pyschic and please note, these are ordinary people who were sceptics but gave us quite a lot of evidence that this daughter is gifted..not sure who the guardian angel is in his vision but it was an encounter..still investigating with my family who it was
3. Found a book in book store to read on 'Angels' of people identifying their experiences with ghosts/angels who have helped them through life...
4.Found a beautiful blue/green butterfly whilst washing my  hands in inside basin on my own...the butterfly would not move ...I picked it up and realised this was a sign that my guardian angels are watching over me..I made a wish and took it outside...then I turn around to look for it and it had disappeared
5. A dream I had my first night back home, I dreamt of snake orange in colour and it shed its skin...I looked up in my dream book I have...dreaming of snakes mean transformation, fertility and rebirthing....the colour orange is also colour of a chakra that sits around the reproductive organs

Now I have never had so many spiritual encounters all at once that could be all recognised as 'coincidental' if one happened on their own I may have thought but there were too  many all within same period of time to be 'coincidental'. I believe the universe is sending me messages that everything will be ok with this IVF cycle and giving me reassurance...

So with Mothers Day today for all the women out there mothers of infertility journey, mothers of angels and mothers have a great day and I look forward to hopefully celebrating this day with a real physical form of child next year..